Tips on maintaining a Social Media presence during your Divorce

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Divorce Lawyer in Houston: In yesterday’s blog post from the Law Office of Bryan Fagan we introduced the topic of social media use- both leading up to and during your divorce. If you have not already done so I would recommend going back to read that article to learn some basics about how social media is handled during a divorce and the effect that it can have on your case.

Today we will pick up where we left off yesterday and get into specific pieces of advice that can be helpful to you in the context of having an online presence while wanting to achieve whatever goals you have in your divorce.

YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA IS NOT PRIVATE

You should expect the opposing attorney to do a thorough examination of your social media profiles and websites. Many people may think of attorneys as folks that pour over thick books in fancy libraries to learn about the law. That is true to an extent, but it is just as true that family law attorneys spend time surfing the web to learn what their opposing parties are up to online.

I have had more than one attorney that has made comments about the things they have found about my client either by doing a google search or looking on Facebook. I have used things about the opposing party I found on Facebook.

The point of this tip is to be aware that what you post online is fair game to possibly be introduced as evidence in your divorce.

CONDUCT YOURSELF LIKE ALL EYES ARE ON YOU.

Divorce Attorney Houston: If you’re driving in your car, or at the office in front of your computer assume that any and everything you do can be tracked and monitored. I don’t mean this literally- there aren’t any cameras on you at all times. But how you act and conduct yourself can have implications in the future for your divorce.

Even something as small as how you treat your spouse in an email or a text message can cause detriment to your case and family. The whole point of a divorce is to work with your spouse on settling your issues and arriving at a satisfactory conclusion for both of you.

If you act rude or curt with him or her that can be perceived as disrespectful or at the very least off-putting. Would you want to work with a person who is nasty to you- even if it’s only online nastiness? I doubt it.

BE CAREFUL OF THE ONLINE PRESENCE YOU CREATE DURING YOUR DIVORCE

It is human nature to want to interact with others and build relationships. This can be especially true during a divorce where you will be losing your life partner, leaving a sizeable void. Your friends or co-workers may be encouraging you to initiate conversation online with old friends or to set up a dating profile. Let’s discuss why this is probably not a great idea.

Keeping in mind the first two tips that we’ve discussed today- that opposing counsel is scouring the internet for information about you and that you should live your life during the divorce like you are being watched- even a casual message board posting or the creation of a profile on a dating website can create content that is usable by the opposing attorney.

If you are active online then you may need to completely take a step back and decide to “go dark” during the divorce, cutting yourself off from the digital world. Ultimately, the question you should be asking yourself is does doing “X” stand to improve your life or those of your children? If you are posting on an ex-boyfriend’s Facebook page or creating a dating profile just to get attention then it’s likely that your motivating factors are not in line with the goals that you have for your divorce.

BE HONEST WITH YOUR ATTORNEY

Houston Divorce Lawyers: Next, I would always be honest with your attorney when it comes to social media use and your activities online in general. This is good advice for all facets of your divorce (and life, for that matter) but if there is something out there on the internet that your attorney needs to know about be sure to inform him or her. The last thing you want is to have the opposing attorney in your case contact your lawyer with information about you that is less than flattering.

Think back to when you were a kid and you did something wrong. You had two options: obscure what you did and hope nobody finds out, or come clean and tell your parents.

Although your parents wouldn’t be happy with you, they could help you solve whatever problem was caused and minimize its effects. If you chose to not tell them, it’s likely that they would be upset with you anyways- not only for not talking to them but for doing the bad deed in the first place.

Your divorce is no different. Your attorney is not a parent, but a partner. If you don’t share important information with your partner then you are setting yourself up for a difficult divorce. Your attorney has probably dealt with similar situations before and will know how to help you resolve any issues that your online activities have created.

EVERYTHING YOU POST ONLINE MAY TURN INTO A BIG DEAL

Finally, do not assume that whatever you have done in the past on social media will not be a “big deal” in your divorce. I have had multiple clients who have attempted to brush off a posting online or photo as something that happened a long time ago that was no longer relevant.

Family Law Attorney Houston: The problem with that line of thinking is that all it takes is a convincing attorney to turn a seemingly benign photo into a huge issue in your case. Again, if there is something online that is in the back of your mind speak to your attorney about … Continue Reading